Humor Disclaimer: The content below is intended as humor.





0800 HOURS: Glimpsers awaken to the cadence of hard knocks. Glimpsers then proceed to prepare for the coming day.

0900 HOURS: Glimpsers consume rations of pancakes with bananas, papayas, and syrup. This meal accompanied by the sweet nectar of succulent Nicaraguan pineapple.

1000 HOURS: Glimpsers experience their first taste of liberation. They are permitted to leave Fort Castillo, in battalions numbering no less than four. Glimpsers are drafted into ALPHA and BRAVO teams.

1100 HOURS: After breaching a multitude of cyber cafes, Glimpsers communicate in local tongue with POIs. After coms are compromised, ALPHA team decides to split into CHARLIE and DELTA teams in a misguided attempt to re-establish a line of communications with authority figures stateside.

1120 HOURS: Mistakes are made.

1121 HOURS:  Coms shutter in and out. A single transmission is decoded. It reads:                               BLACK HAWK DOWN *BREAK* MISSION COMPROMISED  *END OF TRANSMISSION*.

1127 HOURS: BRAVO team arrives at the rendezvous location, and informs  5-STAR GENERAL PAMELA ELLEN JOHNSON that they had lost contact with ALPHA team.

1130 HOURS: Excitement turns sour for 5-STAR GENERAL PAMELA ELLEN JOHNSON, as ALPHA team does show up at base.

1135 HOURS: ALPHA team returns to Fort Castillo. 5-STAR GENERAL PAMELA ELLEN JOHNSON quickly debriefs the team. 5-STAR GENERAL PAMELA ELLEN JOHNSON promptly discovers the breach.

1145 HOURS: ALPHA team is reprimanded.

1200 HOURS: Glimpsers regroup and proceed to the mess hall for lunch. The rations provided include chicken, rice, and salad.

1345 HOURS: After spending time in the brig, ALPHA team again leaves base. They pledge allegiance to 5-STAR GENERAL PAMELA ELLEN JOHNSON and the morals of punctuality.

1600 HOURS: After completing missions at locations which include a laundromat, an ice cream shoppe, and an artisan ceramic shop, Glimpsers return to base. 5-STAR GENERALPAMELA ELLEN JOHNSON’s lips begin to furl into a faint smile after realizing no casualties were sustained. They were met with dinner rations consisting of Gallo Pinto, beef, and plantains.

1738 HOURS: ALPHA and BRAVO team lead a coordinated mission to UNIVERSIDAD DE JUAN PABLO II. They begin to work with local militias, teaching them English.

2000 HOURS: Teams return to base, and are debriefed. 5-STAR GENERAL PAMELA ELLEN JOHNSON strips the title of Supreme Leader from SWOLE and bestows it upon REAPERand GHOST. This was met with a small coup from soldiers and villagers alike, as they realize their god-like authority figure has been forced to step down by the word of 5-STAR GENERAL PAMELA ELLEN JOHNSON.

2200 HOURS: Lights out. Glimpser prepare for covert OPERATION FARMHOUSE.

Wake up call at 0430 HOURS.

Big Love to our comrades.